Aloha! And welcome to Australia’s favourite soap opera!

In this episode, Australia’s prime minister—who once brought a lump of coal to parliament—secretly snuck off to Hawaii while his country burned.

The whole shit-show was documented in a I can’t believe it’s not Canberra hallucinogenic trip brought to you by the Guardian and Adani Coal.

The Guardian:

“Morrison is confirmed to be in Hawaii, after some excited Australian tourists post about having a “few bevvies” with the “bit of a legend” PM. They include a photo”.

Though it looks like a forest fire behind them, my current sources indicate it was in fact a beautiful Hawaiian sunset.

Then a couple of volunteer firefighters died and Morrison decided to “do the right thing” and cut his holiday short.

His flight was delayed landing back in Sydney due to smoke from bushfires.

Here’s a recap of the last three days fires in Australia:

Here’s the same map with the areas burned so far this year (so it also includes fires from early 2019 as far as I can tell):

Three million hectares and counting in recent months. That’s a serving size of Belgium, or 1.5 portions of Wales. Would you like fiery hot sauce to go with that?

I’m impressed Morrison still has his job after the immense stupidity of choosing to be in a Hawaiian beach photo.

It’s kind of off the awesome scale when you think about it. This soap opera really does have legs.

And maybe it shows that Morrison is just human after all.

But clearly also part-muppet.